final.

Honestly, Its hard to stop...

Running that is.

Because I know I can win this way.

I know I fool them...

Because I'm doing it.

With the right words and tones...

I can fast for days at a time.

Without purging, I can win the battle... The battle for diet control. But in doing so I would only be contributing to the war... my war against myself. You see this has gone to far... A little bit of lying to yourself - sure, everyone does it. But not to this degree... I'm tired of being a shell of myself. I'm sick of standing on the sidelines of my own life. I hate knowing what I want but habitually denying myself the pleasure. This habitual sin has got to stop.

sin. what a word.

I'm sinning, against God, and against myself.

So to conclude - I'm starting a new blog...

And ending this struggle for perfection.

__

peace.