red plaid.

I believe that God loves me, I know He loves me, and I want to embrace Him as the lover of me and my soul, yet I am keeping my distance purposefully. Like, it's not against my will, but I don't want it to be this way with all of my heart... if that makes any sense. I want to feel God's love, but I don't want to be vulnerable enough to let God love me. Mutually exclusive, I know. Hence the problem. My spiritual life could be summed up like this... "God, I want to feel near to you, but I don't really want to be close to you." Again, confusing. Issues I'm dealing with.

Tired... can't sleep. Advilpm? In my parents bathroom.... I might risk it though.

[kaylin]